"Competition wise, it was obviously great for me that Hannah left. But she had changed so much by the time she left – she's a great person and she will be missed.

Right now my tolerance levels are low. I can't tolerate anything at the moment – I am on edge all the time. The obvious and the not-so-obvious are getting on my nerves. It's difficult to tolerate others sometimes – mainly Courtney and Billy.

This week's challenge involved us getting into harnesses and learning to walk and do acrobatics along walls. It's one of the perks of being on this comp – being able to do stuff you don't get to do every day. Even smashing against the wall and whacking my hip was cool! I got so much out of it to help me at my shoot. I felt I did well and the best I could. It was a lot of fun, but I probably should have focused less on the fun and more on the job at hand.

I loved my photo this week. I was imagining the shot in my head and the end result was a bit different - I thought my body was a bit lifeless but I liked my facial expression a lot.

At catwalk this week, I had to do a walk off against Billy to determine who would be in the Bottom 3. I had just been through a very emotional judging time and was thinking about what I had done to my girlfriend – there was so much running through my head. Having to do a walk off with Billy especially was tough... but I had my focus and thought it was a good opportunity to show them I could remove my personal life from my professional life.

I would be happy to see Shanina or Rhys win the comp if I don't. I would be pretty stumped if Billy or Courtney won – I would just not understand it. It didn't surprise me that things are so separated in the house now, but at the same time I didn't think things would play out the way they have. Having said that, I never expected to get along with Billy. 

This has been an incredibly hard week. I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life. Being separated from Nat and the way things have gone has made everything worse than it is. I screwed up big time and I need her to know how much I love her.

I don't want to be perceived as a cheating person because frankly, I am not that kind of guy. My girlfriend knows that and that's why she was so shocked by the whole situation. She knows I have gotten lost somewhere along the way and there's so much going on in my head. Shanina is beautiful and think I just dropped my defenses, was foolish and made a fundamental mistake. If I am forgiven for it I will be the luckiest man in the word.

Knowing Nat will have to deal with this, will have to have people come up to her and say they feel sorry for her... it isn't easy. When people don't understand the situation and throw their two cents in, it makes it a lot worse. I got to talk to Nat and we have reached an understanding now which has been the best thing ever. It was very grounding.

I have let Nat know I am spending a lot less time with Shanina, not just because of what happened. Nat would understand Shanina and I still being close, but it's important for me to prove to Nat that nothing else is going on.

This might tarnish my chances of winning but that's something I have to live with. What happened was little and had not a lot to do with comp but I understand people might like me less for it. To be honest, the only person I am really worried about is my girlfriend - she is the only person I really care about right now. If I could take it back, I would. I just want to make Nat happy again.

To all Nat's friends and those who know me – I am still the same person. This journey has been hard, I did get lost at some point, but I have found myself again and I am same person I was when I came in."

Check out our interview with Tom